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第45章摆脱失业的困扰（1）
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&iheJob-lossBlues
？谢里尔·理查森CherylRi
Pickupalmostaoday，aoseeastoryaboutlayoffs.Ifyou’reoheunlues（orifyourfamilymemberis），youmayfindyourselffeelingoverwhelmed，disoriented，orjustplainscared.
Losingajobissideredohefivemoststressfullifegesyouexperiehosewhohavebeefeelslikebeingrobbedofyouridentityandisaspainfulasthelossofalovedoythatresultsshakeupyourlife.It’snormaltofeelpanickyaboutfinanervousaboutthejobsearchprocess，orlonelyforyouroldunityofcoworkers.Andmanydownsizedemployeesareleftwwhattheycouldhavedobeigo（eveclearlywas）.Whetheryouwereexpegthecutorwereshockedbytheionsleaveyoufeelingparalyzedatodo.
Duringthistimeyourfamilymembersmaybedealingwiththeirownfearsandsenseofloss，addingtothepressureathome.Forexample，yourspousemayinsistonkeepiabsonyourjobsearchprocess.Oryour，feeliension，maystartbehavingbadlyatschool.
&ageoflossisdenialahisstageyoumayshutdowivated.Denialisohemind’srotegyou，butgettingstuthisstagetadditionalproblems.OnewomanIkicethatherjobwouldbeeliminatedinsixmonths.Butsheheredtopreparearesumeiwuntiltheweekbeforeshewastoleave.Stuial，shebelievedthatsomethingmiraculousreveable.
&agebriionanger，，sadness，andfear.Duringthisphaseyoumayvacillatebetweeremes.Whehalostherjobuedly，shewentfrintraffiioshakingandsobbi.Ysofangerorsadnessmaylastminutes，days，orweeks.Themoreyouexpressthemihyways—weratthegym，forinstance，yswithatrustedfriend—thequickerthey>
&ageoflossisace，whichmostpeopleetoslowly.Thisisthestagewheosened.Reagaplaceofa’thavetomeahepany’sas—justthatyou’vedeoveonwithyourlife.
Thereisnerieagesofloss.Mostpeoplemoveinandoutofthemovertime.Forexample，youmaystartsleepingmore（orless），eatingmore（orless），andyoumayevenfindyourselfrememberingotherlosses.Thesereasarenormal.Theyalsoserveasaremireatyourself
Itmaybehardtobelieveatfirst，butyouultimatelyusethisexperiee—tofindanother，perhapsevetheionshipwithyourfamilyandtomakesomemueededyourlife.Herearethreeessentialsteps.
Step1
&ionalsupport.
&’seasytofeeluledandvulnerable，reagouttoothersisthekeytomakeasmoothtransition.You’llneedpeoplewhowilllistenandprovideasafehavenforyoutovent，cry，orexpressyourtearsands.Youonatrustedfriend，afellowcoworkeriion，orasibling.Inaddition，youmightwanttojoinanonlinedisgroup（seestep2beloroupatyouruer.Yourloemploymentoffiprovideaffordableresourearyou.
&hissupportinplacebeforeyoutakestepstosecureyourion.Tooofteheiraeroajobiolosetheopportunityandfeeleveed.
Remember，yourspouseandwillbedealingwiththeirowyourjoblossandmayoofferyouthekindofsupportyouneed.Youshouldalsoavtopeoplewhoaddtoyourstresslevelorcriticizeyou.Instead，surrouhosewhomakeyoufeelhopefulathistransition.
Don’tgoitaloakescetoaskforhelp，a，helpmaybewhatyouomovefor
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